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I was the vice-president of risk management, and my job was to monitor and evaluate the financial derivative positions that our traders had booked. I was good at it. At the same time—because there was not a conflict of interest—I was able to trade in the stock market. I was making a lot of money at the time and there was only my wife and I, so that year I bet a very large sum of money on long-term call options. All that meant was that if the stock in the companies I bought went up, I would make a lot of money."It was like the gods decided to take their shot at me—the very best and the very worst happened to me in the next twelve months."Cindy was listening intently and she asked, "Tell me the best first."I responded, "Well the best was that the stock market went straight up that year—'irrational exuberance' one person phrased it. And I made a very large amount of money on my call options. I no longer needed to work."But then the worst came and hit me from behind. My wife was seven. ”“Is it weak to know yourself well enough to know your limits?”“I don’t think so.”“My mom taught me to always be true to myself. I have my hang-ups, but I know what they are and I’m honest about them. At least I think I am.”“I think so, too. But I feel like I let Jocelyn down; that I could have done more. That I CAN do more.”“What did you tell me your counselor said about that?”“That giving up on something that was so important risked being miserable for the rest of my life. Or worse.”“So where does that leave us?”“Nothing has changed,” I said. “What I told you is still true. It’s just difficult.”“Tell me now if it’s going to be a problem.”I shook my head, “No; it won’t be a problem.”“How’s your sister?”“She looks healthy enough, but her eyes looked strange. My dad said she looked vacant, like she wasn’t really there. She SEEMED fine when I talked to her, but she’s fooled me before. There’s a chance she’ll be able to go home in a couple of weeks, but she’s been through a lot.”“That’s.
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